Jill Hennessy

Jill Hennessy rocked out after a premiere of her new film, “Roadie,” by performing at Lower East Side dive Parkside Lounge with the movie’s co-writers, Michael and Gerald Cuesta. The trio played Blue öyster Cult covers as well as tunes from Hennessy’s new album. Michael, an exec-producer on Showtime’s “Homeland,” also directed the movie, starring Ron Eldard as a fictional veteran roadie for Blue öyster Cult who’s forced to move back to his mother’s Queens house after being fired. BOC founding member and songwriter Albert Bouchard was spotted cracking up knowingly at the Angelika Film Center screening, where co-star Bobby Cannavale also made the scene.

Jill Hennessy was born in 1968, along with her twin sister, Jacqueline, bringing joy to lovers of attractive brunettes everywhere. Well, eventually, because if you rejoiced when they were babies, then ewwww.

It's perfectly fine to ogle her now. Rowr!
Her first role was in 1988′s Dead Ringers, which is a movie about twin gynecologists, which means you’ve lost me right there. Apparently, it’s quite good, but twin gynecologists. In 1989, she moved on to a television show called The Hitchhiker, which I can only assume was about someone who hitchhiked around America either solving crimes or committing them, with everybody learning a nice little moral lesson at the end. She was in two different episodes under two different names, so possibly two different characters? In 1990, she moved right on along to the role of Hooker on C.B.C.’s Magic Hour. Possibly it was a character whose last name was Hooker, but probably not.

Speaking of hookers, her first role on the Friday the 13th television series (I know! I’d completely forgotten about it too!) was Spanish hooker. I don’t think she’s really Spanish, though. She also played Vampire Woman, Secretary and Lifeguard over the course of 1989 and 1990, because somebody at Friday the 13th either really liked her or didn’t realize they kept hiring the same woman repeatedly. Also, there used to be a War of the Worlds television series, which I had no idea!, and she was in two episodes with two different names again.

Hooo boy, they didn't try very hard with that logo, did they?
A few more TV series here and there and then, boom, catapulted to fame by 1993′s Robocop 3. Ha, no, I’m just kidding. Nobody watched that. But she was in it, if it shows up one of these days and you’re just too lazy to change the station. (Seriously, though, don’t get caught in that situation.) Also in 1993, she was in some German film that I don’t care about (sorry, Germany!).

But most importantly in 1993, Law & Order: The Best One of All!

And then also in 1994, some movie called The Paper, and in 1996, I Shot Andy Warhol (is the name of the film and not a thing I did).

Ooooh, I didn't know it had Lili Taylor in it.
After her stint in Law & Order, she went on to a bunch of movies that I don’t feel like listing, except for Komodo, which I swear one of my other “Whatever happened to…?”s was in too, as Victoria the Shrink. Seriously, there are a lot of them, and I’m not listing them and you can’t make me.

In 2001, NBC picked up a show about coroners who solve crimes, and I blame CSI for that. That show was Crossing Jordan, which I only watched a few times, and mostly for Miguel Ferrer and Jerry O’Connell. Also? That show was on for six seasons, so I am feeling even less embarrassed about the few episodes I watched because I thought it was only on for two or three years, so I very definitely did not watch all of them.

Nor even most, nor even many.
Anyway, in 2007, Crossing Jordan bid the world of television adieu, and Jill Hennessy went on to some indie film called Lymelife before taking a two-year hiatus until 2010, which saw The Roadie and Small Town Murder Songs, which actually sounds like it should be a Nick Cave album.

Hell, maybe it is.
Since 2010, I’m not quite sure what she’s been up to, but she did release an album in 2009 and sang at 2010′s Lillith Fair, so let’s just go with “she’s concentrating on her music career.”

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